5 Easy First Steps to Pre-Planning Your Funeral (No, You Don't Have to Pick a Casket Yet!)

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Let's cut through the awkwardness: the idea of pre-planning your funeral probably feels about as fun as a root canal. It's dark, it's daunting, and it feels entirely unnecessary when you're busy building a life. But what if it wasn't about planning for death, but about protecting the people you love? And what if it could be broken down into simple, non-scary steps that don’t involve picking out urns or caskets? Spoiler: It can. Here's how to dip your toes in without getting overwhelmed.

1. Have "The Talk" with Your Person

This isn't a formal meeting; it’s a conversation. The easiest first step is to simply mention your wishes to your most trusted person—your partner, your best friend, or a sibling. Next time you're chatting about the future, you could say:

"You know, I was reading something wild today. It said we should tell someone if we’d want to be cremated or buried. I think I’d lean toward cremation. What about you?”

This normalizes the conversation and ensures someone knows your biggest preference without any paperwork.

2. Write a "Just in Case" Note

Grab a notebook or open a Google Doc. This isn’t a legal document; it’s a personal note for your loved ones. Jot down a few quick ideas:

Music: 3–5 songs you’d want played.
Vibe: "A big party,” "something quiet outdoors,” or "whatever is easiest for everyone.”
One specific wish: "Please use this photo,” or "I’d love donations to [this charity] instead of flowers.”

Store this note with your important docs or tell your "person” where it is. That’s it.

3. Organize Your Digital Life (in 20 Minutes)

This is the most practical step you can take. Your digital footprint is a huge part of your legacy. Set a timer for 20 minutes and:

Password Manager: Ensure your phone/computer passwords are in a password manager and grant emergency access to your trusted contact.
Social Media: Note your wishes for your accounts (e.g., "memorialize my Instagram”).

This protects your privacy and saves your family from immense hassle.

4. Research and Save Your Preferences

You don’t have to commit to anything. Just explore. Next time you're scrolling on your phone, spend 10 minutes looking up:

"What is direct cremation?”
"Green burial options”
"Celebration of life ideas”

Bookmark what resonates. This gives you a starting point and demystifies the options, so it feels less intimidating later.

5. Choose Your Advocate

This is the most important step. Your advocate is the person you trust to make sure your wishes are followed. It doesn’t have to be a legal appointment yet—just a conversation. Ask your best friend, sibling, or partner:

"If anything ever crazy happened to me, would you be my person to make sure my family knows I want [insert one thing from your note]? I’d do the same for you.”

This assigns responsibility without any pressure.

You’ve Already Done the Hardest Part

By reading this, you’ve already broken the biggest barrier: starting the thought process. Pre-planning isn’t about making final decisions; it’s about making a few small, smart choices now that will prevent confusion and heartache for your people later. It’s the ultimate act of love—and the highest level of "adulting” you can unlock.

5 Easy First Steps to Pre-Planning Your Funeral (No, You Don't Have to Pick a Casket Yet!)

Want to learn more? Listen to the podcast discussing this blog post.

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